20100601

need

i do not mean to abandon
ignore
disassociate

i've been
busy
forgetful
distracted
moving
hungry
confused
busy
busy
busy
tired

i napped today for 5 hours
the body doesn't lie, does it
when i woke up, alex wasn't next to me anymore
but my body was still tucked in the same position from before
my back snuggled into the cracks on the sofa
legs wrapped around pillows, pretending to be legs
i woke up, feeling satisfied that i didn't have to wake up for anything
that my day wasn't a waste, but a needed rest 
from the long hours of lack of, everything

act, reflection, act
so when the body sleeps
and i am still and quiet, 
i don't mean to abandon
just that i am regenerating for 
the next big thing.

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