20100625

blockage

i usually just pound the keys when i have writer's block.  its not so much a lack of inspiration, but more so a blockage of thoughts.  pounding the keys acts as therapy, as to pound implies frustration and the gibberish that is produced in the process suddenly gives room for the mind to make sense of the randomly displaced lettering.  suddenly words are just pouring from your fingertips.  doodling is like pounding on the keyboard.  it is a space where i have the freedom to scribble, cross out, draw fast, sloppy and something vaguely familiar.  

(then comes procrastination and the tiredness that settles upon your shoulders at 2:51am) i never can comprehend anything after 3a.  it represents the point of no return, where we are then forced to sleep wherever we happen to be, even if that's in the park, under the flood lights.  

2:53a, even as the minutes tick on, my brain begins to dance in colorful fashions.  colorful scarves prance around, draping my mind in rainbows and gratitude.  

this writer's block seems to be the result of my unsureness about art making and drawing in general.  see i don't really consider myself an artist, nor a doodler.  i've always drawn, yes, but it wasn't images that really allowed myself to fully express myself. words have always flown from my pen, almost independent from my thoughts.   many times i have been surprised at myself with what my subconscious is attempting to communicate with the world.  

--ann, as published in Group Poop

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